Y’all Hoes Are Not Demure

Embracing the Chronic Impact of Fleeting Social Media Trends

Disclaimer: This post is all in good fun. If you're easily offended by sass or social media hot takes, proceed with caution—or better yet, lean in and laugh a little! Grain of salt my friend, grain. of. salt.

Recently, I was sent a clip from Shannon Sharpe’s YouTube channel, Nightcap, with the message: “This reminds me of you.” In the clip, Shannon and Chad Ochocinco were laughing and joking about a recent TikTok trend. While the show itself wasn’t the focus, the clip got me thinking about how fleeting and ridiculous some social media trends can seem—and yet how much they reflect deeper cultural conversations.

Further relating this to the world of social media trends, one of my favorite YouTubers, Jade Beason recently made a video discussing this very phenomenon: the short-lived nature of trends in the age of social media. She pointed out how many viral moments are here today, gone tomorrow, with lifespans of just a couple of months. One particular TikTok trend that was supposed to embody being "demure, cutesy, and mindful" came and went like a flash. It was funny, sure, but it also opened a door for me to think about how we perceive femininity today—and how those perceptions collide with the speed of social media.

Here’s the thing: I don’t think we should dismiss trends as shallow or meaningless just because they’re short-lived. Even the most ridiculous viral moments can spark valuable conversations. In this case, the idea of women reclaiming a "demure, cutesy, mindful" aesthetic got me reflecting on the tension between traditional and modern femininity.

We live in a time when femininity feels like it’s constantly being reshaped—or perhaps even abandoned. People talk about women being “too aggressive” or “too masculine,” while debates rage on about gender roles being reversed or erased. Then, a trend emerges that playfully embraces softness and traditional femininity, only to be brushed off as silly or superficial. But why?

Could it be because this trend was popularized by Jools Lebron, a transgender woman? Her involvement adds a compelling layer to the conversation—one that challenges traditional boundaries and reclaims femininity in a way that’s both bold and nuanced. It’s a reminder that the exploration of softness isn’t just aesthetic; it’s deeply tied to identity and representation.

What struck me personally is that femininity—and masculinity, for that matter—aren’t trends. These concepts are deeply rooted in culture, history, and identity. Yet social media has a way of treating them as if they’re just passing fads. What does it say about us that a playful exploration of "demure, cutesy, and mindful" femininity doesn’t feel like it has staying power?

Looking at the role models young women have today, there’s a noticeable shift away from the softer, traditionally feminine archetypes. There’s nothing wrong with bold, brash, and assertive women—I love them, I AM them.

But why does embracing those traits sometimes feel like taking a step backward, instead of simply being another valid way to express yourself? Sure, there are corners of the internet that celebrate this vibe, but it shouldn’t just exist in niche pockets—it deserves to be a mainstay. After all, being soft and vulnerable doesn’t mean being weak. (But let’s be real, being overly needy? Still not cute.)

It’s fascinating how a playful aesthetic can spark deeper conversations about identity, representation, and who gets to define what femininity looks like in the first place.

I think this is where trends, even fleeting ones, can be meaningful. They highlight cultural tensions and invite us to think more deeply about what we value and why. Maybe that’s the real power of something going viral—not its longevity but its ability to spark a conversation that lingers long after the trend itself is gone.

I know, I know—social media isn’t exactly where we go for deep, existential thinking. But in the spirit of keeping this light: No, y’all hoes are NOT demure. And maybe that’s totally fine. But maybe it’s also worth asking why we can’t allow femininity to be as multifaceted and fluid as we claim it should be. Is being cutesy, demure, mindful, and considerate just a trend? Or is it the start of a conversation we’ve been tiptoeing around for far too long?

LET ME KNOW,

-Doe <3